Wednesday, May 09, 2007

the drama

Hi There
I have been really crap with posting considering that I have been spending so much time on the internet.

A lot is going on and I dont really know where to start. Its not all good tho.
Um firstly, I was lucky enough to meet the wonderful Phillipa the other week just before she headed off on her World Tour. She was in Sydney for a few days before heading off to San Fran and Lila and I were lucky enough to spend an hour with her and the beautiful Mary at The Bank. It was like we were old friends catching up, even tho I admitted to her I felt like I was on a blind date. I had literally bumped into Mary a couple of weeks earlier in Newtown. She is much more beautiful in real life and I really enjoyed meeting her! Philippa is a fantastic woman and I wish her all the best on her travels!

My very good friend Jeff is back in town. He was the first friend I met independant of school back in 1986, and we are still the best of mates now. He has been living in London for the past 10 years and he is back for a year. It was the first time I have seen him as a married woman and the first time he had met Lila, and I have to say he fell completely in love with her! It was really lovely to catch up with him. He has gone to Brampton Island for a week and is back tomorrow, so I cant wait to spend a bit more time with him. Welcome home Jeff. I love you!!

We are putting our house on the market in the next couple of weeks. Its very scary but also very exciting as the house that we are moving to in Balmain is FANTASTIC! Its my father in laws place, and it has so much more space and is in a great location. We havent worked out the details yet, but its as well as done. At this stage we should be moving in about 10 weeks. I dont really know how this will affect us, as it looks like my husband and I may be breaking up. He thinks that i have changed too much since becoming a mum, and he feels like he needs some space to find out who he is. I am a bit thrown by all of this, as I feel that I have become a much better person since having Lila. She is the BEST thing that has ever happened to me and I would never go back to my life without her. By my hubby is having a hard time dealing with being a dad and I dont really know what is going to happen to us. I am determined to try and work this out and keep our family together - its going to be tough but I am going to give it a red hot go. I am sure that hubby needs some help, but I cant seem to convince him that its the best thing for him...

Any way, I will keep you informed. I am not having the best time and I have no idea what will happen in the next few months. I hope they improve. I am sure they will once we move and I get myself a job - but that brings its own challanges as I cant find child care. Things are never easy are they...
take care


Kate said...

Hey, I'm sorry to hear all that you have been going through. I think having a baby changes you and your relationship in such a huge way. Things won't ever be the same, but sometimes it can make things even stronger. Keep working on it. The first year is the hardest. So so hard, and I know.. your relationship suffers. We faced our hardest challenges around the age that Lila is at the moment - we were very close to separating (I think because of the changes and struggles inside me, rather than him), we really were in a terrible place. Then I got pregnant again! Hehe, at the time it was horrifying, but in the end, it was what brought us back together - and we have got much better at communicating and making time to be lovers & friends again, rather than co-parents.

I really hope you guys can work this out. :-(

Madelyne said...

Sorry to hear about the marriage problems but I'm sure they'll work themselves out. Hubby is probably having a hard time being the sole provider & feels all the financial pressure right now.

Good luck :)

Suzy said...

I hope all works out well for you.

Have a lovely 1st Mother's Day. How special! xx

crankybee said...

Long time lurker - not sure if I have ever commented here before. If not, HI!

I'm posting because my fiance and I have had counselling and it was the BEST thing - the absolute BEST BEST thing we have ever done. We first saw someone at relationships australia, then went to a woman just off Victoria Rd, Rozelle. It was a very big step to take, but we wouldn't be getting married if we hadn't done it. I would encounrage you to BEG your husband to go - make the appointment, tell him when it is, and remind him of the committment he made to you when you got married. And the commitment he made to your daughter by helping create her. Remind him how much he means to you and how much you want this relationship.

If you would like the woman's name I went to, please email me at

And good luck!